6 tips to help you tap into your sensuality
Hi fashionistas,
When I began sharing my boudoir photo shoot details, I received a lot of positive feedback from women who felt a connection with my journey. I have also gotten comments and questions about the experience from women who don’t feel they can easily access their sensual side.
And I get it.
We’re exposed to so much messaging that tells us how we “should” look, act, and talk. We’re expected to be sexual vixens but also “respectable.” (A lady in the streets…and you know the rest)
It can be confusing and disempowering.
We’re encouraged to lean into our sensuality and sexuality, but not too much. And heaven forbid you actually enjoy sex… It can often feel like that’s a “right” only reserved for men…
All the mixed messaging can be confusing — making us feel uncomfortable, awkward, and unsure of how to tap into our sensuality.
So I’ve pulled together six tips to help steer you in the right direction.
6 tips to help you tap into your sensuality
1. Better understand your sexual organs and how they work
You are responsible for knowing how your body works, including your sexual organs. I recently watched a limited Netflix series called, The Principles of Pleasure, and learned things I never knew.
One of the biggest takeaways for me was learning how similar female and male sex organs are. The series also underscores the disparity in orgasms between men and women. Based on the numbers, we’re getting shortchanged ladies…
You deserve to enjoy sex, and it’s your responsibility to make that happen.
I recently started following Ashley Cobb, a certified sex coach and writer. I love her straightforward and unapologetic advice. She’s one of many resources that can help you think about your sexuality in a way that makes you feel informed and empowered.
Check out Ashley’s content or find an educator who resonates with you for tips, information, and resources.
2. Learn to accept and love your body
Traditional media outlets and social media can be disastrous for our mental health. The “ideals” that are forced upon us have many women thinking they need fuller lips, BBLs, huge breasts, etc.
Take a step back and disconnect from the imagery and messaging that’s contributing to your negative self-image. Think about how amazing your body is and the fact that it has brought you this far. For those who have given birth, celebrate your body for its amazing ability to carry and bear children.
Everybody has a body. And there are things we can ALL do to improve how we look and function. Drink more water, eat healthier foods, become more active, and aggressively pursue self-love and acceptance.
3. Find time to relax
Regularly participate in activities that help you relax. That looks different for everyone, but can include things like:
Creating a playlist of your favorite songs
Taking a candlelit bath or shower with essential oils
Reading
Journaling
Drinking a cup of herbal tea
Meditating
Going for a walk
Sitting near the water and listening to the ocean
Getting a massage
Pampering yourself
A relaxed mind can help you become more inspired and creative, allowing you to more easily tap into your sensual side.
4. Adorn your body with fabrics and clothing that make you feel good
You know I had to say something about fashion and style. Because I understand its power — and how it can make you feel. Consider wearing silky and sexy undergarments just because. Improve your personal style. Wear your nice jewelry or fancier pieces on a “regular day.”
Looking good improves your mood and confidence.
5. Start being honest
Start being honest with yourself and your partner about what you like, want, and need. The conversations can be tough, but why go through life shortchanging yourself if you want and need more?
6. Seek help
If you’ve experienced sexual trauma and haven’t sought help, now is a great time to consider it. Start working through the issues preventing you from embracing your sexuality.
Need a therapist? Check here to find one near you.
You deserve it!
Start slowly by focusing on one small change. Be consistent with it — and once you’ve mastered that, add another small change into your routine. Over time, you’ll become more comfortable and confident.
As women, one of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves is the space to tap into our sensuality and femininity. If you’re not used to doing that, it may take a little work, but you deserve it.
Let me know which tip resonates with you the most. Or reach out with any questions at lauren@thefearlessfashionista.com.
Thank you for reading.